Ding? Dang!

What is it with men and their cars? Let me be more specific, lest I be criticized for generalizing. What is it with my husband and his cars?? Although, come on, I know I’m not the only one! Relate if you can.

We have been fortunate in that most of our married life, we have always had two cars – his and mine. Models have changed over the years, but to my dismay, there is one thing that never changes – his obsessive preoccupation with the slightest ding. If there is a gnat sized ding anywhere on the car, my husband will find it. To be fair, he does wash the cars and has more of an opportunity to scrutinize every square inch of the paint. Oh, I have offered to wash the car on occasion only to be told thanks but no thanks. He says it gives him a good chance to “look things over.” And does he ever!

I had a pretty dismal ding streak a few weeks ago. Three dings in one week! One night he came in from work looking so forlorn, I thought he was ill. Are you OK, I asked? “Someone hit your bumper,” he painfully replied. What?? Hit my bumper?? Where? How? When? I had no clue.  We both go out to the garage to peruse the damage. Based upon his reaction, I was expecting the worst. It wasn’t pretty, even from my perspective. There was a relatively deep scratch that would take some serious touching up. I felt terrible. Earlier in the week two other door dings had surfaced.

So, here’s the deal. I love my husband. And I know the overall condition of our cars is VERY important to him. Realizing that just because something doesn’t hold the same level of importance for me as it does for him does not relieve me of my responsibility to try and accommodate his persistence in maintaining our cars in pristine condition.

What can I do?? I diligently practice ding avoidance. I try to park in an end-parking place whenever I can. I resist parking next to two-door cars because they have bigger doors. And since my last episode, I am even searching for parking spots where the chance of someone backing into me is minimized. Honestly, it’s quite draining. I mean a girl has to go places.

I may think his ding obsession is a little over the top, but, hey, he thinks eight pillows on our bed is a little much. Yet, he patiently helps me arrange each one to my liking.

And isn’t that really the give and take of a loving relationship? Recognizing these dings for what they are – an opportunity to express gratitude. Saying thank you for some of the actions we sometimes take for granted – like washing the cars or making an attractive bed. Now, that’s something to give a dang about!

Bio: Yippee! I am free to be me! I retired from a nursing career (and other various pursuits) last year and am now exploring and developing my previously dormant, creative self. I love writing, acting, and acting like I’m writing. I live in Tampa, Fl with Prince Charming and within sniffing distance of five delicious grandchildren.

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